In an increasingly Orwellian world, everyone should be armed with this hilarious, slyly subversive deconstruction of the slippery locutions of spinmeisters from all walks of public life. Doublespeak guru William Lutz (
Doublespeak, The New Doublespeak
) is uniquely qualified to bring you this supremely funny expos' of the juiciest ways THEY are trying to bamboozle you!
A sampling of
Doublespeak Defined
:
Bald
n./: hair disadvantaged Men in Japan aren't bald; they're "hair disadvantaged," according to
The Japan Economic Journal.
Diet
n./:1.nutrional avoidance therapy 2. caloric reduction program
Frozen
adj./:1 deep chilled 2. fresh 3. hard chilled 4. previously frozen
The USDA considers processed chickens "fresh," not frozen, if they have been chilled to 28 degrees Fahrenheit. Chickens so processed have not been frozen but "deep chilled."
Light Switch
n./: ideogram illumination intensity adjustment potentiometer
Waste paper basket
n./: user-friendly, space-effective, flexible desk side sortation unit
Government officials in Toronto, Canada, paid $123.80 (Canadian) each for these items.