For over one year Barbara McVeigh served as a substitute teacher in San Francisco and Marin County public schools in California. In that effort, she had opportunity to observe and learn about our current state of public education. She often witnessed and experienced daily trauma, abuse and often times a disregard for what should be natural - a respect toward another human being. Her notes herein are not meant to shame or blame, they are to expose a toxic system of disrespect and inadequate schooling so we can reconcile the challenges we have as a means to heal and reshape who and what we are as California and as an American society.