When I was 7, I thought about becoming an astronaut and explore space. Of course, when I imagined myself in space, I was always wearing this full body suit, floating around the moon with several hunks beside me, cheering me on. The good news: I reached . The news: it wasn't in the way I hoped. I was . By a It's embarrassing and it's a long story. But that's how it happened. When I met an , I thought he'd experiment on me. You know, laid flat on the medical table with a scalpel and weird alien technology to see how Earth-people were like. Oh, he on me alright. But I was with all the way. Because you see, we were weren't green blob things. They're tall hunks with 6 pack abs, thick thighs, wide chest, and really looooong...you know. Eat your heart out, Chris Evans.