He comes to me in my dreams; although, not as often now as he used to. My son. It's funny what the mind can do. Sometimes he's ten and sometimes he's thirty-five. But always I recognize him and he's calm and level-headed. Always he assures me that he's okay. I would do anything in the world to get my son back, but that is beyond my abilities no matter how much I want it. AUSTIN is a memoir about dealing with the pain of losing a child. Some of it is about remmembering him, and some of it is about giving advice on knowing your kid and following your gut when you have that child who doesn't turn out fairytale perfect.